It Shouldn't Be So Difficult....

Not a great photo, but this is the Valentine I made for my daughter Bonnie

One would think as much as I've been through in my day, both emotionally and physically, that compassion would come easily for me.
But it doesn't always, and I spend a great deal of time feeling ashamed, and punishing myself, doubting my sincerity.

I know that I feel Love...not just mushy Valentine-type love, but 
real LOVE.

I truly wish that compassion was easier for me to express. Truly.

For those that are interested, the "other blog" I mentioned is now up and running! Visit Gut Wrenching here

A Whole Lotta Love

So I'm feeling a little frustrated today.

OK, a LOT frustrated! 

There's so much to get done, and it seems like everything is going wrong....one of those days!

I finally decided that I can sit here, frustrated, and accomplish nothing.

OR..... I can spread a little love around and change it all!

I can make a few other folk feel happy and make myself feel all better, with a coupla clicks.

So why not?!

I think I'll give away some love by giving my sweet, sweet readers some Valentine gifties---

I think I'll start with a box of my homemade chocolate covered cherries for you to indulge in...

And then I'll give away a little velveteen pouch filled with love you can spread around your neighborhood....

 Then I'll throw out a mini-version of my Message in a Bottle, so you can share the love with your Love!

To clarify, this is three separate gifts, to three separate readers.

And all you gotta do is share some love with me here!

Your comments so often make my day...

You guys rock!

Sending Love on Gilded Wings

from the Phoenix Rising -- Georgia Theatre Art Quilt Project
by Yours Truly

Where do I wish to send some love today?

Love being the most important thing that exists, where do I NOT wish to send it??

I wish to send it to all the parts of my body, especially to those parts that I tend to not find acceptable---not only that round, saggy belly, those seemingly ever-widening hips, but also to those tangled, knotted muscles that have been screaming for my attention for so long.
They have been slowly but surely responding to my love and attention, releasing their painful grip, and I feel deep gratitude to them for all that they are re-learning to do for me.

I wish to send love to all the hopes and dreams that I've let go of over the years of family-first, and physical pain, the ones who are daring to peek out, blinking, bleary-eyed at the glaring light of day.

I wish to send love to my bi-polar husband's darker side, accepting it as a part of him....embracing the shadow, learning to love and live with all of him.

I wish to send love to his estranged children, the ones that I have befriended, and the ones who remain separated from us. I also wish to send much love to his soon-to-be-born grandson (his first grandchild), half a world away from us, and especially to the daughter who carries him.

I wish to send extra love to each of my own children today---
those that are making their way out in the world, and those still at home who are struggling with tough school years (last year of jr high and last year of high school), and with depression.
I am so proud of each one of them!

Oh there are so many more places that need, want, deserve my love today!
I wish that I had time to list them all, but I will keep each of them in a special place in my mind and heart today.

Thank you Jamie, for reminding me today.......

Ahhhh ...... Peace

Sweet Rose
by John William Waterhouse
One of my favorites of all time!

I had decided I would not post today upon seeing Jamie's Wishcasting Wednesday prompt.
What do I wish to experience??
Come on!
The list is far too long!

As usual, upon further consideration
.... and I wonder if this is not Jamie's intention, to make us do more than pop off the first thing that comes to mind, realizing that there is more to the prompt...more to US than that......
the answer came to mind----

I wish to experience PEACE.

If I can experience even a small few of the items on my list, I will experience peace.
I wish to experience health.
I wish to experience some semblance of financial security.
I wish to experience the joy of using my God-given gifts each day.

And I wish true peace for myself, my family, my friends, all of us.

Guest Post--- Happy Mother's Day, from My Canadian!

Motherhood - "A seed of limitless potential which when nurtured...

blossoms in colors unimaginable... with benefits beyond comprehension"

Mother' Day 2010 is soon to be.

I am not ready for it.

I have often wished that Mother's Day was held on the day of ones birth. A combined affair where the event celebrates the birth of a new being, and the transformation of another.

These celebrations would big like Easter, Thanksgiving, or Christmas, and have a spiritual tone rather than a secular one. The original event of our birth was a very spiritual one. A soul expanding, unifying connection, that unleashed a flood of emotion that, in reflection still holds it's original enchantment and surrealism. These events would be held several times a year, corresponding to the number of births a Mother has experienced. I would not label these celebrations as Mother's Day or Birthday. They would rather be called Love Day, for it is memorializing the first day of loving and being loved.

Lets face it. We were not born with a concept of love. We learned it from our Mothers. We nursed, cried, messed, slept, got sick and then well again, all because our Mother first loved us. As we got older all the hugs, kisses, and snuggles from Mother brought us warm feelings that we enjoyed experiencing. We found that giving hugs, kisses, and snuggles to others also felt good. We may not have understood why these actions created emotions in us, or what these emotions meant, but we would label them as love and continue to grow from there.

As we grew together, Mother would (without any thought or expectation for repayment), express her love for us through her ongoing sacrifice. Sacrifice was a condition that was occurring right from the beginning, starting with morning sickness, emotional disorientation, physical discomfort, cramping, the issuing of blood and water, overwhelming pain, and relentless fatigue. That was your beginning, and now with time, maturity, and understanding, you came to see that her hugs, kisses, and snuggles, may have reassured us, but it was in the sacrifices that she laboured on your behalf that her true love lived and grew.

We emulate what we experience, and when we couple our behaviors with an understanding what they mean, we begin to thrive. Her love for us taught us to love others. Love is what is most important, and is the true measure of greatness in an individual.

Are Mothers perfect? Of course not. But I believe that the concept of Motherhood is perfect, and that all mothers who struggle to do their best in delivering hugs, kisses, snuggles, wiping dirty faces, driving to and experiencing recitals, games and doctors appointments, and issuing forth blood sweat and tears, makes the world much better place than it otherwise would be, and a simple one day a year commemoration celebrating Motherhood seems completely inadequate in comparison to their accomplishments and sacrifice.

Thank You ...Mother.
Thank You... Wife.
Thank You... Mother of Our Children.

Make 'em or Break 'em

"Heh Heh...."

The Canadian laughed when he heard today's Wishcasting Wednesday prompt....
What rules do you wish to make... or break.

"This is going to be hard for you .....You don't like rules. You want to break ALL of them!"

Off the cuff I thought "yeah, he's right. I don't like rules".

Upon further consideration, I decided that it's not RULES I don't like.
Rules must exist, correct?
Certain universal laws exist.....it's not the laws I dislike; it's what happens when I don't follow those rules that causes me trouble!

What I dislike vehemently is authority.
No, let me clarify---I dislike authority for the sake of authority....rules just for the sake of having power over someone else.
Now THOSE rules I'll break every chance I get!

I find myself breaking more and more rules as I learn to just be myself, not listening to others' opinions, not concerning myself with what they might say.
And I'm not feeling remorseful; I'm not feeling guilty.

If I could make my own rules (and I can, can't I?) ---
LOVE would be the basis for everything else....the reason for and the thought behind every other rule.
Love is THE most important thing there is.
If my rule were in place, there would be little need for any other rules.
Think about it.