Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I'm All I Need

I'm All I Need

If I learned nothing else in my “Year of Doing Nothing”, I discovered that I am all I need. I am enough....just like I am. Constantly struggling to change or better myself is, in reality, not necessary.

I found that I could trust myself; my own opinions and feelings were valid....I didn't need to ask anyone for their permission; I didn't have to weigh their opinions in order to act. Heck, I don't even need to feel rejection when my girlfriend doesn't answer her cell phone (I've also realized that half the time, she just can't find it!)!

Some of you already empowered women may laugh; some of you may snicker nervously to yourselves, but I'm betting most of you are silently nodding in agreement; you know exactly what I'm talking about, maybe not even consciously, but you're feeling that little ping of agreement in your gut.

Most of us were shut down as young girls. I was relieved to discover earlier this summer that I was SO not the only one who felt this way! Read more of our conversation at my new friend Christine's blog

It's been a long, slow, often painful climb to where I am right now, and though life's not perfect, I'm pleased to be able to say—I am enough.

This is Freedom From Self Improvement week over at Jennifer Louden's place Yeah, I know---the week is half over, but there are still lots of delicious freebies to be found there.

I'd been slowly digesting what Jen had to say on the matter over the last little bit, but yesterday's blogpost from Creative Juices artist Chris Zydel pushed me over the edge, and she has graciously allowed me to share some of it (ok, a big chunk of it!) with you.

“Somewhere along the line.... I got kind of burned out on trying to fix myself. I had spent most of my 20's, all of my 30's and half of my 40's trying to get better. To heal old wounds and improve myself so that I could have a happier and healthier life. In many ways it's been a very worthwhile journey and I've made some powerful and much needed changes in my overall existence.

But at a certain point I also began to realize that it was not very much fun to always be scrutinizing myself for what was wrong with me. That I would have a much better and more enjoyable experience if I took my attention off of what was not working and put it onto what was already easy and good instead. It was making the shift away from what I didn't like or shouldn't be and moving more in the direction of my hearts desires. It was letting go of "Never Enough" and embracing the question "Where Is My Joy?" much of what drives us to change is based on fear and shame. We believe that we're not good enough, we are continually cowering under the shadow of a deep sense of inadequacy, we walk around feeling really bad about who we are and constantly vowing to making ourselves into a new and upgraded version of our old and unacceptable selves. We spend all kinds of time and energy and money polishing up our image, whether it's physically through trying to lose a few pounds or emotionally by whipping ourselves into a constant state of bright eyed, cheerleader, peppy, positivity .

We THINK that we're doing a good thing by trying to "improve". But really it's a sneaky way for the inner critic to get it's hooks in us. Every time we are driven to make ourselves "better" we are not allowing ourselves to accept who and what we are, just as we are in this very moment, as completely and utterly perfect.”

Amen Sister! Don't take my word for it, Friends---it's being shouted from the rooftops all over!

You are all you need! You are enough!


maggiegracecreates said...

Is that Hannah? Beautiful post. now for a huge laugh go here - dog lovers only will really enjoy this

Jennifer Schildknecht said...

OMG, and I thought MY dogs were awful!! Didn't realize how blessed I really am! LOL

Nope, that's ME at Hannah's age...
a page from the "my face" journal.
That's a drawing OF the original photo. We are identical, eh? I'll post some others of us "twins" later on.
Thanks for the love!

maggiegracecreates said...

wow - that resemblance is amazing.